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5 Coping Strategies for When You're Feeling Anxious at Work

Gina, a former colleague of mine, spent most of her career dreading work. She constantly worried about her performance and often felt overwhelmed by the pressures of her job. As Gina’s anxiety began to interfere with her work, causing her to lose focus and miss deadlines, it became clear she needed to get help.

If you’re one of the 40 million people living with anxiety like Gina, you know that common office situations—anything from talking to co-workers in the elevator to speaking up on a meeting—can take on heightened stress.

You may find that you have trouble concentrating on the work in front of you. This may result in chronic self-doubt and work nightmares.

While it’s true that nearly everyone experiences some level of stress these days, living and working with anxiety is different. It can be crippling, but it doesn’t have to push you down. Beyond getting the right diagnosis and treatment like Gina did, you might consider incorporating some simple coping strategies into your daily life.

1. Know Your Triggers

Pay attention to situations that spike your anxiety—whether that’s getting feedback, writing important emails, being put on the spot, or starting the day with a messy desk.

Keep a journal to document your observations and look for patterns. When you know what makes you the most uneasy, you can better anticipate challenges and create a plan to deal with triggers.
When Gina realized rushing was one of her anxiety triggers, she created a warm-up ritual to practice before big meetings. She started blocking off 20 minutes before the start to review the agenda, jot down questions to ask, and grab water.

She began arriving to the conference room five minutes early, settling in if it was available, and, prepped and relaxed, she made easy small talk with her co-workers. The advance planning enabled her to feel at ease—not frantic. And this calmness in turn allowed her to be fully present and contribute to the conversation in meaningful ways.

2. Have Go-To Grounding Techniques

Anxiety activates the body’s fight or flight response, which sets off a number of uncomfortable reactions from sweating to tunnel vision. Calming yourself with grounding techniques—or ways to stay in the present moment—can get you back in control and feeling better fast.

Meditation, stretching, calling a friend, or going for a walk are all great options. You’ll have to find what works best for you depending on your personality and what’s acceptable in your office environment, but this list is a great place to start.

Your company might even offer mindfulness or yoga classes, or encourage power napping for productivity. All of these are self-care options that can benefit the anxious mind greatly.
I’m a big fan of Box Breathing, a method used by the Navy SEALS that involves slow, controlled breathing. It’s inconspicuous and many of my coaching clients use it during meetings or high-pressure situations when they feel anxiety coming on.

3. Create Conditions for Success

Make your well-being part of your daily to-do list. Simple changes like avoiding too much caffeine, working by a window with natural light, and controlling noise in your workspace with headphones can all help keep the racing thoughts at bay. While you can’t control most of your enviornment, make it a point to change what you can.

Prioritizing rest is huge. Studies have found that getting more sleep helps about 50% of people feel more at ease and less anxious. Outside of the office, focus on creating rock solid work-life boundaries. For instance, pick a non-negotiable time to put away your work—and stick to it.
Scheduling fun after-hours activities can help make that a reality.

4. Ask for What You Need

Know your rights when it comes to managing your mental health at work. You can ask for accommodations under the Americans with Disabilities Act, including a flex schedule, additional time for assignments, and more frequent breaks.

Consider also making reasonable requests that’ll help you enormously—things like soliciting questions ahead of a presentation or asking your boss not to send you late-night emails unless it’s absolutely urgent.

If you’re explicit about your needs, respectful of others’ time and schedules, and intentional about producing quality work, it’s likely your team will have no problem honoring your preferences.

5. Set Micro-Goals

Setting small, achievable goals is always smart, but it’s even more important when you struggle with anxiety. You want to expand your comfort zone, yes, but you also want to be careful not to overwhelm yourself.

For example, if you’re trying to grow your network and change careers, you might aim to go to one industry event a month—not one a week. Setting realistic expectations for yourself is key to not only building positive momentum, but also preserving your well-being.


Living and working with anxiety doesn’t have to be debilitating. While there may be setbacks in your journey, make sure you celebrate every little victory along the way. Rally a support team around you who you can lean on in good times and bad. And if you have an understanding boss, embrace that relationship and practice effective communication about what’s going on with you and when you might require a little flexibility.

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The Life-Changing Mindset That Made This Man A Millionaire | T. Harv Eker

 



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9 Moments to Appreciate Every Day if You Truly Want to Be Happy

Success and happiness aren’t easy to achieve. It takes a lot of time, hard work, and luck to get there.
That’s why, along the way, you’ve got to take advantage of moments—those brief periods of time when all can be right in your world.
Here are nine moments worth experiencing every day if you’re looking for a happier and more successful life.

1. A Moment of Laughter

There’s physiological and scientific evidence that shows that smiling and laughing put you in a better mood.
Take time every day to laugh, and you’ll find it’s both contagious and uplifting. Surround yourself with funny people, find opportunities to laugh at yourself, and laugh your way to the top.

2. A Moment of Celebration

We don’t take the time to celebrate small successes enough—or even big successes.
At my company, Likeable Local, we instituted a “Moment of Rock” every day at 5 PM to celebrate our successes from the day. Everybody rocks out like their favorite sports team just won a championship.
How can you take at least one opportunity per day to celebrate the good in your life?

3. A Moment of Reflection

We all lead such busy lives. It’s important to be able to take at least one moment each day where we do nothing but think.
Put your phone away, get somewhere by yourself, and simply reflect (it doesn’t have to be long!) on the day that was and the day that will be, about decisions to come, and about what you’ve learned from the past.

4. A Moment of Stillness

There’s reflection and then there’s true stillness—the ability to shut off everything, including your mind, and get into a meditative state.
The busier your life is, the more valuable it is to practice moments of stillness. Yoga and meditation are the most popular ways to get into this state, if only for a few minutes (science says you can reap the benefits in 15 minutes).

5. A Moment of Pride

A lot of people associate the word “pride” with something negative.
But you have so much to be proud of. You can afford to take a least one moment each day where you sit back and appreciate all that you’ve done and the good person that you are. Take pride in the little things you’ve accomplished along the way.

6. A Moment of Humility

Pride in your accomplishments is great, but so is a moment of humility, in which you appreciate your tiny role in the profoundly large universe around you. When we take a second to appreciate the amazing world around us, it’s hard not to be happy for all that we have.

7. A Moment of Connection

Ultimately, human beings are social beings.
So, take at least one moment a day to connect with the people around you—your significant other, friends, and family. Hold someone’s hand, give someone a hug, or cuddle. Your happiness isn’t just about you, it’s about others.

8. A Moment of Joy

Laughter is great, but joy is even more powerful. Take a moment to experience the joy of your kids or family, the joy of your spiritual connections, or the joy you can find in play, or music, or dance.

9. A Moment of Gratitude

Finally, take time each day to express gratitude—for the people in your life, the experiences you’ve had and will have, and the world around you. You can’t physically feel angry or upset and grateful at the same time, so just taking a moment of gratitude will make you happier.


Again, these are just moments—meaning they shouldn’t take up too much time, and chances are you already do them on a regular basis. But by being aware of how powerful these can be, you put yourself on the path to true bliss.

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How to Deal with Haters: 5 Bulletproof Tools

Learning how to deal with haters might be one of the best lessons you will ever obtain. That is because everyone significant will have haters at one point in their lives. The only people without haters are the ones doing nothing. When people think they can’t achieve something they want to make you believe you cannot achieve it too. If you step out and try to prove them wrong, they will also step out and try to prove you wrong for proving them wrong.  These are the people pouring hate speech on your Twitter, Amazon reviews and smearing sly comments on your blogs. They are called haters.  In order to succeed you need to learn how to deal with haters, because the are an inevitable part of life.

I understand what you are going through because I have been there too. You start a  non-profit organization and give all you have, only to find out there are people who believe you are the one becoming wealthy in the process. You publish a book, and though everyone is giving it raving reviews, you are surprised by this one person who claims to have understood precisely nothing of your work. Some people cannot understand running a business is metaphorically as painful and tiring as its physical equivalent. Instead, they proclaim that you are greedy because you are not giving them a piece of the profit. Isn’t it funny how they think they deserve to share in your profits without sharing in your labors?

If only there was a way to make everyone understand that you don’t mean the world any harm; like Steve Jobs said, all you are trying to do is “to put a dent in the universe.”

Negativity is parasite that eats you from the inside out, and it takes a great deal of time and patience to learn how to deal with haters.  At first it may seem difficult if you are not taught correctly.

However, in life you can’t decide who offends you, but you can decide how to respond when you are offended. The greater part of dealing with haters involves dealing with your own self. In this article I will tell  you how to soar on the winds of haters. There is no motion without friction and there is no friction without applied effort. Therefore in adversity smile, because friction is a sign that you applied effort and a sign that you are going somewhere!

How to deal with haters in five easy steps…

1. Ignore Haters

Haters are egoistic people. I guarantee the reasoning behind their aggressive behavior towards you on social media and IRL (in real life)  has nothing to do with you.  Their main goal is to attract attention to themselves. You are being noticed, therefore they want to be noticed too. This is why the best solution is to ignore them.

If you want to grow someone’s ego give them attention, and if you want to destroy it simply ignore them. That will teach them if they want to boost their ego, you are not the best person to turn to. Attention is too precious a resource to be paid to everyone. Are you aware of the twenty four hour rule? The rules states that whatever issue you ignore for twenty four hours starts to decay. That is why even Facebook has incorporated an information decay algorithm – information gains popularity by being given attention and decays by being ignored. You can best shrink hate speech by ignoring it.

People like following dialogues, but if you ignore your hater’s speech it remains a boring monologue that nobody bothers to reflect upon.  Don’t frown, smile or cry about it – just live on like it never existed.

2. Feel Important

Nobody hates a nobody. Nobody hates a dead man. If you have a hater it shows you are somebody – it shows you are alive. Ironically,  hate can help make you feel important. You can’t stand up for something without standing up to someone. However, t is precisely standing up to someone that creates your haters. You can’t win at something without out beating someone, and in return, it is beating someone that creates your haters. So if you have haters then throw yourself a celebration party, because haters are a sign that you have stood up to someone and won at something. Haters are a luxury only of the great.

One of the reasons I studied Psychology at university was because I wanted to understand why people behave the way they they do. I realized you can tolerate practically any behavior, good or bad, if you understand why it occurred. When you understand the psychology of envy you stop fearing haters and start anticipating them. When you understand why people hate, every hate word meant to make you mad will make you feel proud of yourself.

Most times the people who dislike you the most are those that envy you the most. They dislike you because you represent something that they feel they don’t have. You succeeded in area that they failed at. You may even hear some of them openly say "If I had that your luck I would use it for a better purpose.” These words suggest your haters credits your success to luck, because they are envious of your abilities. So next time they throw hate speech at you remember to feel important"

3. Keep Your Advisors Close

Haters think they know the way to success, though all they do is talk without ever sulking in it. If you take their words to heart, you might delude yourself into fulfilling insignificant roles that have nothing to do with your dreams. Know that anyone can be your critic, but not everyone can be your advisor.

Advisors asks you questions but enemies question you. Identify people who have succeeded in your field and only appoint those as your advisors. Sometimes they can only be a few as three individuals. 
Also, keep in mind that criticism is not the same as counsel. The appointed advisors in your life will help you weed out the constructive criticism from the pure hate.

4. Maintain Focus

Ask any F1 racing champion and they will tell you your car goes wheresoever your eyes go. Focus on the road and you will stay on the road, but if you focus on the wall you will run into the wall. Remember, you never wrote that book/launched that product/composed that song for your haters.

They were not the reason you got started so don’t make them the reason you stop.

The only people who have the energy to be commentators are the ones watching the game – not playing it. You can’t focus on the noise and the game at the same time. In fact, if you score, the boos will only grow louder. Instead choose your battles wisely because time and energy are always limited.

By spending your energy fighting haters you might find you don’t have the energy to build your dreams or fulfill your goals. To be a fighter is different from being a builder.

5. Twist the Tweet – The Best Way to Fight Back

Hurting people creates a chain reaction consisting of pain. If a hater tweets at you you that they wish upon a serious disease such as cancer the best to do is to ignore them. If you chose to take them seriously your bitterness will surely grow into an emotional or even physical cancer of some sort. Understand that no-one can give you the pain that they don’t have. In response, give them the joy and gentleness that you do have.

In regards to the cancer comment mentioned earlier, the best response to that statement would be:
“I wish you long life full of health and joy!

These are the five steps on how to deal with haters. That’s all for now my friend. I recommend you read the article Believe in Yourself  next, as you will find it very helpful. Otherwise have a great time upstage, because that is where you belong – at least you have fans and haters to prove it. Don’t forget to remind yourself self that  for every one hater may you have a thousand friends!

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13 Powerful Ways to Overcome Self-Doubt (So You Can Finally Move Forward in Life)

“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.”
William Shakespeare

Self-doubt can be a troubling and persuasive voice that holds you back.
It holds you back from seizing your opportunities.

It makes getting started or finishing things harder than they need to be.

Sure, it can sometimes be useful as it helps you to soberly see your current limitations or simply recognize a half-baked or bad idea. But mostly, it holds you back in life.

So how can you get around that, how can you overcome those times of self-doubt so that you can move forward once again?

In this article I’ll explore 13 tips and habits that have helped me to decrease that destructive inner voice.


1. Say stop.
First, when your inner doubts bubble up, be quick. Don’t let them spin out of control or grow from a whisper to a stream of discouraging sentences. Instead, talk back to that doubtful part of yourself.

In your mind, say or shout something like: No, no, no, we are not going down that road again.
By doing so you can disrupt the thought pattern and stop that inner self-doubter from taking over.

2. Look to the past and awash yourself in the memories.
Be real with yourself and ask yourself:
How many times when I doubted myself or feared something would happen did that negative thing come into reality after I still took action?

The answer for me – and probably for you too – is not very often at all.

Self-doubts are most often just monsters in your head that your mind may use to keep you from making changes and to keep you within the comfort zone.

If you look to the past and see how well things have gone many times despite those self-doubts then it become easier to let go of them or to ignore them and to focus on the more likely positive outcome and to take action.

3. Talk to someone about it.
When you keep your thoughts on the inside they can become distorted, exaggerated and not very much in line with reality or reasonable expectations.

This is very much true when it comes to self-doubting thoughts.

So let them out into the light. Talk to someone close to you about your self-doubts.

Just letting them out and saying them out loud can often help you to hear how exaggerated these thoughts have become. And by talking about those doubts with someone that is supportive you can get a change in perspective.

4. Don’t get stuck in the comparison trap.
If you compare yourself to other people all too often, to their successes and especially to their high-light reels that they share on social media then self-doubt can quickly creep up.

A better way to go about things is to compare yourself to yourself. To see how far you have come. To see what you’ve overcome.

And to see how you’ve kept going, succeeded and grown as a human being.

5. Start keeping a journal.
Keeping a journal can be a helpful habit for many reasons. When it comes to self-doubts it can help you to:

• Keep a realistic record of your life. And help you to remember the positive things, the successes you have had and how you have overcome obstacles if you are prone to remembering things with a negative slant.
• Gain clarity more easily. It is often easier to alleviate fears and doubts and to gain clarity if you have an issue laid out on paper or in a computer document rather than if you try to go through it all in your mind. By making lists of pros and cons, going through your thoughts and emotions and similar events from the past and by writing down different perspectives on the issue it becomes easier to find solutions and to see your challenge in a clearer and more level-headed way.

6. Remember: people don’t care that much about what you do or say.
When you worry about what others may think or say if you do something then the self-doubt can quickly become stronger and you get stuck in inaction and in fear.

When that happens remind yourself that the truth is that people don’t really care that much about what you do or not do.

They have their hands full with thinking about themselves, their kids and pets, jobs and upcoming sports matches and with worrying about what people may think of them.

7. What someone said or did might not be about you (or about what you think it is).
When someone criticizes you then it’s easy to start doubting yourself. When someone rejects you and you don’t get a second date after that first one that you think went pretty well then it’s not so strange to get down on yourself.

But what if what he or she said or did isn’t really about you at all?
Perhaps your co-worker that verbally lashed out at you is having a bad day, month or marriage.

And you might not have gotten that second date because the other person’s mom got sick and he had to focus on that or because he reconnected with his ex-girlfriend and wanted to give their relationship another shot.

You don’t know everything that’s going on in another person’s life. And the world doesn’t revolve around you. So be careful so you don’t misinterpret and build blame and doubt within without any reason.

8. Get a boost of optimism.
Let someone else’s enthusiasm, motivation and constructive optimism flow over to you.

Spend 20 minutes with a an audio book, a podcast or a book that gives you that. Tim Ferriss’ podcast has helped me with this recently and  I’ve over the years often listened to audio books by Brian Tracy to get this boost.

This quick 20 minute session can greatly help you to shift your self-doubts into optimism and into thinking constructively about your challenge.

9. See a setback as temporary.
When you have a setback then you may start to see things through a negative and dark lens. You might see this current setback as something that will simply be your new normal.

This way of looking at things can trap you in thinking that there’s no point in continuing to take action.

So instead:

• Remember: You are not a failure just because you failed. Setbacks happen to everyone who take chances. It is simply a part of living life fully. Sometimes things go well and sometimes they don’t. So don’t make a failure into this huge thing or into your identity.
• Ask yourself: what is one thing I can learn from this setback? Use the mistake or failure to your advantage and to move forward once again in smarter way.

10. Sharpen your skills.
If you, for instance, often get self-doubt before a presentation in school or at work then sharpen your presentation skills.

Read a few books about it and practice at home in front of a mirror or in front of a friend. Or join Toastmasters to get the experience or knowledge you need.

Then you’ll feel more confident, competent and relaxed in such situations.

11. Don’t beat yourself up about it.
A common way to handle self-doubt is to get angry at yourself and your lack of motion. To try to beat yourself up as a way to get yourself to move forward.

That does not – in my experience – help that much.

I have found that being kind and constructive when feeling self-doubt is a better choice. So I use kind and understanding words towards myself but I also ask myself:
What is one very small step I can take to move forward in this situation?

Then I take that very small step and start to step by step move towards where I want to go.

12. Celebrate that small step and win.
When you’ve taken one small step forward and you’re done with it then you have a win. It may be a small one but it’s still a win. So celebrate it.

Have a tasty snack or your favorite food for dinner, spend some time on your favorite hobby or buy yourself something you’ve wanted for some time now.

This will renew and recharge your motivation and make taking action feel more exciting and fun. And that will push self-doubts aside so that you can keep moving and get more small and bigger wins.

13. Remember: You can course-correct along the way.
Trying to plan every move you will make on a journey towards a goal or dream can become draining and lead to quite a bit of self-doubt.

And it it usually don’t work that well anyway since the best laid plans often start to fall apart a bit or need some change when they are confronted with reality.

So do a bit of rough planning and then start your journey.

And remember that you can always course-correct along the way towards what you want. Empowered by the new knowledge, experience and feedback you will get as you keep going on that path.

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The Best Thing You Can Do for Yourself When You're Stressed

One of my responsibilities at work is managing 15 students who serve as peer health educators. When I ask how they’re doing, they ramble off the multitude of activities they’re involved in, the exams they’re studying for, the projects that’re due, the causes they’re advocating for, and, well, the list could go on. And on. When they finally take a breath, I ask, “And how are you practicing self-care?”

This concept is rather self-explanatory. In simple terms, it means treating yourself—mind and body—well. And it’s something that should be part of everyone’s routine—not just those in college. Because these days, we’re all really, really, busy—or we like to think so, at least.

This busyness, among other things, is causing us all to be stressed out, too. In 2014, 77% of the American population reported feeling the physical effects on a regular basis and 73% said they’d felt the psychological ones. On top of that, 33% indicated they consistently experience extreme levels of it. And as I’m sure you’ve heard before, stress can negatively impact pretty much every part of the body.

But despite this, we often neglect to take the appropriate steps to unwind, especially when things get difficult and demanding. “During stressful periods in our lives, we tend to focus outward,”says Margarita Tartakovsky, an associate editor at PsychCentral.com. “We diminish or disregard our inner life, ignoring our needs and limits. And yet, it’s during hectic or difficult times when we need to care for ourselves the most.”

I know—when life gets chaotic, it may seem impossible (and unproductive) to fit in self-care. But the truth is, you probably have more time than you think, even if it’s just a couple minutes. It’s up to you to examine your schedule and find that extra space in your day.

Once you find those pockets of time, you must start with the basics—brushing your teeth well, getting enough quality sleep, eating well-balanced meals on a normal schedule, taking a shower, and so forth. Yes—this sounds obvious.

And it should be. But if you don’t start with the fundamentals, you won’t have anything to build on. And you may be surprised that you aren’t paying enough attention to some of these essential behaviors.

Just last week, I was talking to a friend about how she often forgets to eat lunch due to her overwhelming workload. And, confession? There have been mornings I’ve opted for a 20-second mouthwash rinse rather than two minutes of brushing my teeth because I have to get out the door and I’m going to be late! (Hint: Mouthwash is not an adequate substitute for teeth-brushing, and 90 more seconds won’t make me late.)

But it goes beyond these simple, everyday things. In my department, we frequently talk about the wellness wheel, which encompasses seven different areas of your health—physical, social, spiritual, intellectual, financial, emotional, and environmental. Sometimes, occupational is thrown in there, too (though it should be included all the time, don’t you think?).

You want to find balance across the entire wheel; and in order to do this, you can practice self-care for each section. For instance, perhaps for social, you pencil in a weekly catch-up session with a good friend. To address your financial wellness, you choose to open a savings account or meet with a financial advisor. And while spiritual could be choosing to reconnect with your faith, it can also be taking the time to identify and explore your core values.

The trick is to do what you enjoy. Don’t try to force yourself to engage in activities that don’t make you feel better or happy. For instance, I like the feeling that spinning gives me when the class is over, but I honestly hate 41 out of the 45 minutes I’m in that room. My feet fall asleep, my hips hurt, and the monotonous scenery makes me to glare at the instructor unforgivingly (similarly to how my cat looks at me).

Will I take an occasional class with friends? Sure. But I won’t choose it for my physical self-care. Instead, I’ll take a run on a trail, find a yoga class that prioritizes relaxation, or get a massage (when I can find a decent coupon).

You can practice before, during, or after work hours. There are no rules, other than implementing it on a regular basis and making sure the actions you choose are contributing healthy and positive ways. (And If you’re not sure where to start, try filling out this assessment. It’ll help you see which areas need a little (or a lot) more love.)


As Tartakovsky says, “practicing self-care not only helps us feel better, it also helps us function at our best. It replenishes our reserves, boosts our energy, and provides clarity. We’re able to do everything from making smarter decisions to helping others.”

You must be in top-notch condition to do your best work, and you must be at your best before you can help others be at their best. That includes partners, friends, family members, co-workers and—yep—your boss (gasp). This isn’t selfish behavior. It’s necessary.

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How To Be a Better Person Using These 11 Simple Steps

Do you recognize this scenario? You find yourself reacting or handling changes in a way that feels less than graceful. You begin feeling down and wondering why you can’t seem to do better. Most of us have been there. Don’t worry; there’s always a way to improve.  If you want to be a better person the phrase is “out with the old and in with the new.”

 

To help you get started, here’s a list of 11 things that will help you on your road to self-improvement.

 

1. Review Your Strengths.

Don’t cop out and say you don’t have any strengths. Of course you do! You can use the strong points in your personality to support you as you make yourself into a better person. Make a list of the things you like about yourself and post it somewhere you can see it. It isn’t arrogant or narcissistic; it’s actually a great tool to use whenever you’re feeling down on yourself. If you’re reading this then the odds are that you’re already a pretty decent person. Sometimes you just need a little reminder!

2.   Know What Needs Improvement

Aren’t lists grand? It’s time for you to write down the things you don’t like about yourself.  Evermore, it’s important to recognize where you can use improvement so that you can take the necessary steps to change yourself. It’s important to remember, however, as you start your list, that this isn’t meant to make you more self critical. In fact, it’s meant to empower you! You’ll find that the negative things in life tend to have more control over you when they’re hidden than when they’re recognized!

3.   Work on One Thing at a Time

Try not to work on too much at once; if you get overwhelmed you may find yourself giving up. Choosing the thing on your list that bothers you the most is a great idea! It will make you feel like you’re on top of the world and will also make the rest of your list seem easy!

4. Positive Affirmations

This is something you can do in the morning upon waking up and in the evening before going to bed. Choose something you’d like to accomplish in the coming day such as “I will be more patient at work.” or “I will be calm under stress.” It’s important to use positive words such as “I will,” instead of negatives like “I won’t.” You’ll find that when it comes to affirmations, word choice is always important.

5. Meditate

When you hear the word “meditation” silent monks sitting cross-legged on the floor of a Buddhist temple may come to mind. However, meditation is actually extremely diverse and you’ll find that you can tailor it to your individual needs. For example, some people meditate while taking a nice easy walk while others sit in a garden and contemplate something beautiful. Some people even use doodling or coloring to calm their mind. There really is no wrong way to do it, so long as it’s working for you, don’t worry about what everyone else is doing. Take it and make it your own. You’ll find that any meditating you can do is a great way to become a more balanced person and to solidify the lessons you’ve learned during the day.

6. Find a Physical Activity That You Enjoy

Wait, how can exercise make me a better person? Well, part of becoming a better person is about feeling better in general, and exercise is one of the best tools for improving your energy levels and your mental health. It’s also a great way to get ready for meditation. You may try something like yoga or you may just go for a jog or swim. It doesn’t matter so much what type you choose, so long as you enjoy it enough to keep doing it.

7. Don’t be Afraid of Change

To be a better person, you’re going to need to learn to accept change. Change is what makes us better and it’s what makes life interesting, so learn to embrace it and go with the flow. You don’t want to be like that old man down the street who does nothing but complain about how much things have changed since “his day.” Why shouldn’t today be his day? Why shouldn’t it be your day too? Why don’t you read some of these awesome quotes about change to get you started?

8. Honor Your Friends and Family

Remember this. You DON’T exist in a vacuum. You coexist with friends, family, coworkers, and millions of other people. How you act and what you do affects the people around you, so be aware of how you’re treating them. Remember, most of them are trying just as you are and they also face daily trials and hardships. If you feel up to it you can even ask a friend or a family member for help. One of the best ways to stay on track after deciding to make changes is to have someone other than yourself to hold you accountable.

9. Listen to Your Parents and Grandparents

Why learn all your life lessons the hard way? Do you realize that there are people much older than yourself who have already learned them and who are likely more than happy to share? There is also a ton of advice written on the internet that may be inspiring or motivating to you. Don’t feel you have to figure everything out yourself. That’s just your ego talking.

10. Believe in Yourself

Yes, it may seemed over-said to the point of cliche, but there’s a reason for that. You’ll never make the changes that you want to make in life unless you learn to believe in yourself. Remember that you’re amazing just for being willing to improve yourself and that there has never been an individual quite like you to walk this earth. You’re up to the task, and if you want to be a better person, then you will succeed.

11. Try Writing in Journal

Want to really see how the changes you make are affecting you positively? Write each day about how you feel your day went, the challenges you faced, what you were proud of, and how you could have done better. Then you can look back and see just how far you’ve come.

Are you ready to take these steps to improve yourself and your life? It may not always be easy to change long-ingrained habits, but it’s probably not as difficult as you think either. None of us are perfect. We are all on a never ending journey of self improvement and self-realization. If you make an honest effort each day to change the things that you don’t like about yourself and strengthen your positive traits, you will start to realize that you are more wonderful than you could have ever imagined. You can enrich not only your own life, but also all of the lives you touch around you.

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How to Set the Mood for a Positive Day

Our physical environment can have an enormous impact on our well-being. Although we don’t have complete control over our surroundings, we can make specific efforts to infuse them with positivity.

Think about your office: What feelings does it inspire? People who flank their computers with pictures of loved ones aren’t just decorating—they’re ensuring a hit of positive emotion each time they glance that direction. Bring a framed picture of your spouse, child or closest friends to set on your desk. It’ll boost your mood every time it catches your eye.

Making time to go outside on a nice day also delivers a huge advantage. One study found that spending 30 minutes outside in good weather not only boosted one’s positive mood but also broadened thinking and improved working memory. Don’t forget to take a break from the screen every once in a while for a breath of fresh air.

You have the power to set yourself up for success.

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One of The Most Inspiring Speeches by Jim Kwik - The Power of Morning Ro...

What's your morning routine?

Jim Rohn - FOCUS ON ONE THING (Jim Rohn Motivation)

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Jim Rohn on point as usual. Another great presentation

STORY THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE - One of The Best Speeches Ever - 2018 ...

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Inspirational Collection of interviews

Here’s How I Shut Down My Negative Thoughts With Just 3 Words

I like to think I’m an unofficial expert on negative thinking. It’s not unusual for me to start and finish the day ruminating on something that could go wrong—but most likely won’t. And, I typically take my lunch with a side of worry, too.

I’m far from alone: The average person has 60,000 thoughts per day, according to the Cleveland Clinic. Of those thoughts, 95% repeat each day, and, on average, 80% of repeated thoughts are negative.

I’ve tried numerous tactics to cut the negativity, including, but not limited, to: shouting “stop” in my head when a negative thought appears, softly singing “Oops!…I Did It Again” to drown out the thoughts (thanks, BritBrit!), writing down all my negative thoughts to see my irriational thinking, and meditating.

Today, thanks to a variety of tactics and professional help, I’ve learned to better manage my anxiety. But that doesn’t mean I’m “negative thought-free.” I’m still human—so I’m always on the lookout for new strategies to check my negativity.

You Control Which Thoughts Matter

I learned about this mindfulness hack from popular self-help blogger Eric Barker, who runs the blog Barking Up the Wrong Tree. In a recent post about emotional strength, Barker explains that we can’t control which thoughts “bounce around” in our mind. What we can control is the thoughts we focus on.

“You’re the thing that decides which thoughts are useful and should be taken seriously,” he writes.
And, he shared a perfect analogy to better explain this:

You’re not your brain; you’re the CEO of your brain. You can’t control everything that goes on in ‘Mind, Inc.’ But you can decide which projects get funded with your attention and action.

So, how do you decide which “projects” get funded? Barker says to ask yourself:

Is this useful?

It’s a tactic he learned from Joseph Goldstein, a Buddhist mindfulness expert. It’s designed to help you assess if a thought is serving you or others—or if it’s just irrational.

“If the worry is reasonable, do something about it,” Barker writes. “If it’s irrational or out of your control, recognize that. Neuroscience shows that merely making a decision like this can reduce worry and anxiety.”

This past week, I decided to put the strategy to the test. When negative thoughts (unsurprisingly) popped into my head, I challenged them with a peaceful, “Is this useful?”

Pausing to ask that question did a few things: First, it forced me to climb out of my thoughts and see them from a new perspective. I became CEO of Haley’s Mind, Inc. My mission: To make sure thoughts bettered the company. Adopting that point of view made me more curious than concerned about what went on in my head.

Second, asking, “Is this useful?” made me more intentional when I challenged my thoughts. Unlike desperately shouting at my thoughts to “stop,” I calmly faced them head-on and assessed them. I quickly decided if the thoughts served me, and I let those that didn’t fall to the wayside.

I started viewing my thoughts like a Tinder scenario: I swiped left for those that didn’t prove beneficial to me, and right for those that I could actually act on. I was making my thoughts work for me, not against me—and it felt good.

Take Back Your Power

I’m definitely sticking with the “Is this useful?” tactic—and I’d recommend people with negative thoughts give it a try.

But one thing I’ve learned as a “negative thought expert” is this: What works for one person might not work for everyone. Mindfulness, journaling, a classic early 2000s jam—there are lots of ways to combat negative thinking. It’s all about what works best for you.

However you manage your Mind, Inc., just know that you are in charge. And any unfriendly “employees”—a.k.a., negative thoughts—are yours to dismiss.

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10 Things The Rich Do That The Poor Don't - Why You Are Still Broke

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Let's keep working on our New Year Resolutions

9 Tips to Help You Strengthen Your Integrity

If you ask company executives to reveal their “core values,” integrity is always one of their first answers, says Joel C. Peterson, chairman of the board of JetBlue Airways and a Stanford University professor of management. The single most important ingredient to business success is trust, Peterson says, and trust starts with integrity.

Entrepreneur and angel investor Amy Rees Anderson borrows from C.S. Lewis’s famous quote, defining integrity as “doing the right thing all the time, even when no one is looking—especially when no one is looking.”

Anderson offers many examples of acting without integrity: CEOs who overstate their projected earnings because they don’t want to be replaced by their boards of directors. Competitors who lie to customers to seal a deal. Customer service reps covering up mistakes because they fear clients will leave. There’s no shortage of high-profile major lapses, too: Bernie Madoff’s long-standing operation of a Ponzi scheme considered to be the largest financial fraud in U.S. history, Michael Milken’s conviction for violating U.S. securities laws after being the one-time toast of Wall Street, and Major League Baseball star Alex Rodriguez’ use of performance-enhancing drugs.

“Do what is right; let the consequences follow.”

But what does a person acting with integrity look like? Positive examples may be harder to find. Anderson, who lectures on entrepreneurship at the University of Utah, believes “there aren’t enough of us saying that sometimes it’s better to lose than to lose your integrity.” A plaque in Anderson’s office reinforces her philosophy: “Do what is right; let the consequences follow.”

That holds true in both personal and professional relationships. “If you don’t have integrity, it bleeds over into other parts of your life,” she says. Peterson agrees, saying that integrity can’t be compartmentalized—that “there is a kind of integrity across all of our behaviors.”

“A Ton of Work”

Acting with integrity can be difficult. “There are plenty of situations that are not altogether clear,” says Peterson, who has collected examples of integrity challenges during his long career in business and academia. In one of them, the chief financial officer of a company where Peterson served on the audit committee was unjustly accused of wrongdoing by a regulator.

“The dilemma: You are spending shareholders’ money to protect the CFO, and if you just fire the guy it would all go away. On the other hand, that’s the wrong thing to do, and it could destroy this man’s life,” Peterson explains. So he asks whether you make that decision according to your own standards or the standards of shareholders to whom you answer. “We fought. We said [the regulator’s action] was wrong. We won’t cave, and we won’t be bullied.” The outcome: The regulator dropped the matter, and the board’s audit committee sent a message to the company that “integrity matters here.”

This is the stuff of management and leadership, and it takes a ton of work to build.

The committee’s action represents the “organizational integrity” that Peterson deals with in his own professional life and in his management and leadership courses at Stanford. Organizational integrity is “a broader notion that embraces the idea of alignment, where what you do and what you say are consistent,” Peterson says. “Think of a bridge or a structure with integrity; they’re all bolted together in a way that can withstand shocks. This is the stuff of management and leadership, and it takes a ton of work to build.”

Building Integrity

“Talk to the people around you” to get a handle on your integrity, recommends Tony Simons, author of The Integrity Dividend: Leading by the Power of Your Word. “Find ways to get honest feedback from others. You need to find out if—and that goes double if you’re a boss—you have the appropriate level of trust. Integrity stands as a driver of trust.” Anderson advises that you “let those around you call you out…. Be willing to have people police you. Your trusted advisers [should be] people who will tell you whether you’re acting with integrity or whether there’s a better way to handle something.”

As for building your integrity and modeling it for others, Simons, Peterson and Anderson offer these suggestions:

1. Fulfill your promises.

To your staff, your investors, everyone. If you break a promise, you must apologize, but don’t let this become a pattern.

2. Keep appointments.

Doing so affects you professionally and personally (practicing your faith, staying fit, being present for family, etc.).

3. Before you make a commitment...

“Stop and soberly reflect on whether you are 100 percent sure you can deliver,” says Simons. “You need to be dispassionate in that evaluation.”

4. Get comfortable with saying no.

No one can say yes to everything and follow through on it all.

5. Examine how you react in knee-jerk situations...

As well as how you make longer-term commitments (e.g., attending events, completing projects, etc.). Use this introspection to become self-aware, keep score and improve. (You can also use this behavioral yardstick for determining whether others act with integrity.)

6. Polish your communication skills.

Reread that email or report before you send it; plan what you’ll say in oral presentations and phone calls. “Fuzzy communication leads to broken promises,” says Simons. Ask someone to proofread written communications and point out ambiguities before you distribute them.

7. Consider the habits and skills you need to develop to enhance your integrity.

You might need to stop certain actions (e.g., speaking impulsively or sugarcoating your responses). And you might need to improve on others: building your personal courage (because fear holds you back from acting with integrity—Peterson’s CFO might have been fired without others showing courage). Issue apologies “faster, simpler and aimed more at containing the damage [you may have done] than at justifying yourself,” says Simons.

Peterson advises to take great care with the language you use, especially when dealing with sensitive issues such as sexual preference, racism and religion.

8. Avoid people who lack integrity.

“Do not do business with them,” Anderson writes in a blog post. “Do not associate with them. Do not make excuses for them. It’s important to realize that others pay attention to those you have chosen to associate with, and they will inevitably judge your character by the character of your friends.”

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Mel Robbins: This is Why Women Don't Get Ahead

Some help to achieve your New Year's resolution.

3 Ways to Be Kinder to Yourself on a Daily Basis

What comes to mind when you think about self-care?

Do you associate it with being selfish? Or, do you see the benefits, but feel you’re coming up short in sticking to it? Perhaps you find yourself wishing: If I could just develop a regular practice, then everything would feel right in my world.

Whatever comes up for you, imagine what it might be like to realize you already have a solid routine—you just have to recognize it. What I’m talking about is shifting the way you think to appreciate yourself for everything you are doing on a regular basis.

Often what’s missing in our habits is self-awareness. Here are three easy tricks to help you adopt a self-care mindset that will actually stick:

1. Make a List of What You’re Already Doing

The first trick is simple: Make a giant list of all of the things you do that could be considered self-care. Things like brushing your teeth, feeding your body, moving your body, getting rest—you get the point. Write down all the things you do that require you to look after yourself.

The next step is to make a list of things you love to do. They don’t have to be big things (but they can be, it’s your list). On my list I have things like: enjoy a cup of coffee, get outdoors, read a book, snuggle with my children, have a good belly laugh with a dear friend, go for a run, enjoy an uninterrupted bubble bath.

The point of this step is to help you become aware of the detailed picture of your idea of self-care—what you want to be doing and what you’re currently doing—and how far along you already are.

2. Take Time to Appreciate the Little Moments

Here’s where you consciously set out to appreciate the things you’re doing while you’re giving and receiving them. It’s often the step we overlook because we can get so caught up in believing we never have time for ourselves that we miss savoring the time we do get. And it’s all these moments combined in a day that make for a solid, lasting, self-care practice.

A trick I use to help me see and savor all the moments in my day is to say to myself: “This is a gift for you, from me.” I say this to myself while I’m enjoying those first sips of coffee, or brushing my teeth, or making my bed.

It’s a simple statement, yet it’s one that has a way of immediately waking me up. What we focus on becomes our reality—if we want more self-care, all we need to do is put our attention on what we already do for ourselves.

3. Regularly Check In With Yourself

Lastly, check in with yourself regularly. This gives you the opportunity to have an honest conversation with yourself about what’s working well, and what you would like to shift. Perhaps you’re getting enough exercise but have noticed you’re staying up too late and not getting adequate sleep. Or, maybe you’ve had lots of social time and have been indulging in rich food and drink and want to scale it back.

This step isn’t about beating yourself up for what isn’t going well. It’s about growing your awareness, listening to your intuition, and making course-corrections that’ll keep you on the path that feels best for you.

Regular check-ins give you the opportunity to pat yourself on the back for all of the self-care you’ve been implementing, and help you feel motivated to continue going in a direction where you’re stronger and better equipped to weather the storms that come up in life.

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Focus On Yourself And Not Others (One of the Best Speeches Ever)

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Moving visuals and complimentary music, Great way to start the day.

How to Beat Self-Doubt in 5 Seconds

This is worth the time to listen.

5 Signs Your Fear of Failure Is Keeping You From Your Best Life

 Inside every human being is a desire to pursue wild ambitions and discover new possibilities. There’s a would-be entrepreneur, motivational speaker, freelance writer, stage performer, or off-the-grid traveler in all of us.

But unfortunately most people spend their lives in a routine, nondescript comfort zone because they’re too intimidated to chase a goal that seems uncertain and prone to fail. According to a 2016 survey, an estimated 34.2 million Americans experience some type of phobia. The most common is a fear of personal failure, which most of us define broadly as unemployment, financial ruin, and isolation from others.

Also called “atychiphobia,” this fear of failure often becomes so debilitating it can hinder a person from attempting any goal that is not a guaranteed success. It feels safe and secure, but functioning in this state of rigidity will hold you back from opportunities, experiences and overall happiness.

Here are five potential indicators that a fear of failure has come between you and the life of purpose, excitement, or satisfaction you dream about.

You Procrastinate or Avoid Responsibility

 

Did you know there’s a direct correlation between the fear of failure and a person’s ability to manage assignments within the time allotted? According to Adam McCaffrey, a researcher whose work was discussed in Psychology Today, those who panic at the idea of failing exhibit a lower sense of self-determination that often causes a lack of motivation to finish deadline-driven projects. It squelches the confidence to take on major responsibilities. If you feel immobilized to perform tasks out of concern that you won’t succeed, this fear of failure can inhibit your productivity.

You Feel Discontent in Your Career Path

At some point in your career, you’ll feel disengaged and antsy; ready for something new, but not paralyzed without knowing where your next step should be. Author and entrepreneur, Daniel Gulati, reported that job dissatisfaction rates are well above 80 percent, but that most people are unlikely to quit a current profession and seek out their real passion instead. He ascribes this trend to a behavior known as “risk-aversion.”

This theory of risk aversion suggests individuals are conditioned to choose safety and familiarity over ambiguity and unpredictability, often to the detriment of their own happiness. If you allow extreme caution to keep you stuck in a mediocre or creatively stifling position, this fear of failure can stagnate your career growth.

You Worry About Disappointing Others

 

Prolific keynote speaker Mike Robbins points out in a HuffPost article that the effort to avoid disappointing people can negatively impact the outcome of a decision or paralyze someone from making any decision in the first place. Those who define failure in terms of letting others down ignore their own aspirations because they’re too focused on cooperating with the opinions of everyone else.

Robbins argues that too much emphasis on outside voices will deter a person from experiencing fulfillment and authenticity. If you avoid disappointment, this fear of failure can harm both your relationships and self-awareness.

You Experience Physical Effects of Stress

 

When people spend all of their energy fixating on the possibility of defeat, they risk suffering both physically and mentally. Our bodies manifest stress and anxiety in a wide variety of ways, including panic attacks, headaches, sweating, muscle spasms, insomnia, and gastrointestinal distress.

An outward sign of anxiety should not be disregarded, but rather, taken care of before it escalates into a more serious condition. If you have extreme reactions to stress, this fear of failure can jeopardize your health over time.

You Aren’t Proactive About Your Future

 

In an article for HuffPo, Stan Popovich, author of A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear, discusses that people tend to overanalyze future events because they’re unable to predict what might happen. This pattern leads to feeling powerless.

Without immediate assurance and instant gratification, the unknown becomes a source of distress for many individuals. If you sidestep thoughts, plans or conversations about the future, this fear of failure can sabotage both your current goals and future prospects or opportunities.

Before you can overcome a phobia, it’s crucial to understand the reason it exists in the first place. Consider working with a therapist to uncover the causes of your anxieties regarding failure. Once you commit to taking risks that are important to you, you’ll discover a stronger, bolder, and happier version of yourself.

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Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) Demonstration

Great introduction to EFT and over 1 million views. Let me know what you think

10 Things to Do When You’re Miserably Successful

You made it. You set a crazy goal and you reached it! But now the excitement is wearing off, and that nagging feeling that there has to be more than this is starting to sink in.

You tell yourself, I have every reason to be happy, so why do I feel this way? Luckily, you have both the answer and the solution to that question.

Here are 10 strategies to help you remember what you already know and finally break the cycle of never-enough.

1. Stop.

Drop everything you’re doing. Take a timeout. Whatever you need—a moment, an hour, a day—just be with yourself. Yep, that’s right. Do absolutely nothing. As a recovering overachiever, I know how hard that is, but it’s also the first step out of the vortex of never-enough. The best timeouts are usually spent in nature, without your cellphone. Nature reminds us of how effortless growth can be. When we allow that same ease into our lives, any sense of struggle begins to diminish.

2. Breathe.

How are you breathing right now? Can you take some deep belly breaths? If that’s too much, can you simply slow it down? Notice what your breath is like when you’re off and also when you’re on your game. Deep breathing is the coolest and fastest built-in reset button. So if you want to get and stay out of a funk, use it. Here’s the simplest way to get started: Inhale through your nose, pretending there’s a balloon in your belly and that you’re filling that balloon with air. When the balloon is full, release your breath on a steady stream through your mouth. Repeat until you feel grounded and centered.

3. Listen.

Take a moment with that not-quite-right feeling. What’s it telling you? Have you been using work, food or your favorite distraction to numb that call? We’re not trained to listen, especially to that all-knowing voice within. Tuning in requires stillness. It means we have to lessen the amount of thoughts we’re having, and the other ways in which we’re ignoring our deeper needs. There are many ways to still your thoughts and quiet the inner saboteur, but even just applying the simple breathing exercise above for three to five minutes daily will lead to heightened intuition and a deeper sense of what you really want.

4. Imagine.

After deep listening, it’s time to imagine—IMAGE-IN—what you really feel called to right now. Give yourself permission to go back to being a kid, to tap into what you know is already there waiting for you. This doesn’t have to be super complicated. This year, for example, I cut out a 10x11-inch piece of cardboard from an old box, drew 12 boxes to represent the 12 months of the year, and then used different colored paint markers to write down what I felt deeply called to create each month. I dreamed of releasing a book in June, and that actually happened! So don’t underestimate how powerful this simple exercise can be.

5. F.O.C.U.S.

Follow One Course Until Successful. In a keynote speech about the Third Metric, Arianna Huffington discusses the dangers of multitasking: “You think you’re being efficient, but actually you’re being stupid.” As Arianna points out, we now have scientific evidence proving we cannot multitask. Knowing that, take a look at what you’ve imagined. What’s most important to you right now? Maybe it’s taking time off to spend time with your child or a personal project you’ve been putting off. Whatever it is, it’s time. Don’t let all the things you can choose get in the way of what you know you must. When you set up your time and space to single-task, you’ll accomplish more and feel less stressed and more satisfied.

6. Create.

To paraphrase motivational author Napoleon Hill’s work, knowledge is not power. It’s potential power. Knowledge without action is completely useless. So what actions could you take today to move in the direction of your F.O.C.U.S.? What could you create? When I had a full-time corporate gig, I dreamed of starting a blog. I didn’t even really know what a blog was at the time. But I used my lunch breaks and late evenings to find out and to simply start writing. What daily action can you take in the direction of your dreams? Small, consistent practices lead to big, crazy, cool results.

7. Connect.

Who can help you and who can you help with what you’re creating? When you connect to your deepest desires, you’ll also start connecting with the people and circumstances that steadily bring them to life. And remember, in this information age, you can spend time with anyone you want. Find someone who’s succeeding in the areas you feel called to create in and study them. What are they doing differently? Make it a point to learn something from them today—either by reading or listening to their work, or by finding other creative ways to engage indirectly or directly with them.

8. Share.

Talk about what you’re creating and how you’re connecting. Start to use social media—and all the other ways we can instantly share—to tell your story in as real and raw a way as possible. Pick a platform (preferably only one) to start. I personally really like Instagram, because I feel it’s more storytelling than void-shouting. But you’ll also find me sharing ideas onstage, in a Here to Thrive podcast, or at local coffee shops over java with friends. How do you like to connect? Maybe it’s holding a meet-up, writing a blog post, pitching a piece for publication or hosting a webinar. Whatever it is, remember No. 6 and start creating!

9. Celebrate.

When’s the last time you celebrated yourself? If you’re miserably successful, I’m guessing you rarely (if ever) have. One of my favorite ways to celebrate is to turn the music up and dance! I also love romantic dinners with my husband, special girl dates with my daughter and weekend escapes with friends. What does celebration look like to you? Gift yourself a bath, or a walk in the park, or—if you want to get really fancy—a weekend away! You are so worth it.

10. Start again.

Start over. Use these 10 strategies to constantly reconnect with what’s most important to you and to fearlessly walk in the direction of your heart’s dreams. Because here’s the thing: You can’t outsource your growth and the unique contribution you’re here to make. No one else can do this work for you. As Lao Tzu put it, “At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.” Now, go for it!

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Demartini Inspirational Quote

9 Moments to Appreciate Every Day if You Truly Want to Be Happy

Success and happiness aren’t easy to achieve. It takes a lot of time, hard work, and luck to get there.
That’s why, along the way, you’ve got to take advantage of moments—those brief periods of time when all can be right in your world.

Here are nine moments worth experiencing every day if you’re looking for a happier and more successful life.

1. A Moment of Laughter

There’s physiological and scientific evidence that shows that smiling and laughing put you in a better mood.
Take time every day to laugh, and you’ll find it’s both contagious and uplifting. Surround yourself with funny people, find opportunities to laugh at yourself, and laugh your way to the top.

2. A Moment of Celebration

We don’t take the time to celebrate small successes enough—or even big successes.
At my company, Likeable Local, we instituted a “Moment of Rock” every day at 5 PM to celebrate our successes from the day. Everybody rocks out like their favorite sports team just won a championship.
How can you take at least one opportunity per day to celebrate the good in your life?

3. A Moment of Reflection

We all lead such busy lives. It’s important to be able to take at least one moment each day where we do nothing but think.
Put your phone away, get somewhere by yourself, and simply reflect (it doesn’t have to be long!) on the day that was and the day that will be, about decisions to come, and about what you’ve learned from the past.

4. A Moment of Stillness

There’s reflection and then there’s true stillness—the ability to shut off everything, including your mind, and get into a meditative state.
The busier your life is, the more valuable it is to practice moments of stillness. Yoga and meditation are the most popular ways to get into this state, if only for a few minutes (science says you can reap the benefits in 15 minutes).

5. A Moment of Pride

A lot of people associate the word “pride” with something negative.
But you have so much to be proud of. You can afford to take a least one moment each day where you sit back and appreciate all that you’ve done and the good person that you are. Take pride in the little things you’ve accomplished along the way.

6. A Moment of Humility

Pride in your accomplishments is great, but so is a moment of humility, in which you appreciate your tiny role in the profoundly large universe around you. When we take a second to appreciate the amazing world around us, it’s hard not to be happy for all that we have.

7. A Moment of Connection

Ultimately, human beings are social beings.
So, take at least one moment a day to connect with the people around you—your significant other, friends, and family. Hold someone’s hand, give someone a hug, or cuddle. Your happiness isn’t just about you, it’s about others.

8. A Moment of Joy

Laughter is great, but joy is even more powerful. Take a moment to experience the joy of your kids or family, the joy of your spiritual connections, or the joy you can find in play, or music, or dance.

9. A Moment of Gratitude

Finally, take time each day to express gratitude—for the people in your life, the experiences you’ve had and will have, and the world around you. You can’t physically feel angry or upset and grateful at the same time, so just taking a moment of gratitude will make you happier.


Again, these are just moments—meaning they shouldn’t take up too much time, and chances are you already do them on a regular basis. But by being aware of how powerful these can be, you put yourself on the path to true bliss.

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